Please joke responsibly. Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to stammer out an apology. Maybe 22, he says. During the pandemic, my two granddaughterssix and eight years oldwere being home-schooled by their mom. I was at the customer-service desk, returning a pair of jeans that was too tight. Then they responded, confused, Excuse me, maam, but youre at Tim Hortons. Submitted by Wendy Singedonk. .Rd5g7JmL4Fdk-aZi1-U_V{transition:all .1s linear 0s}._2TMXtA984ePtHXMkOpHNQm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;margin-bottom:4px}.CneW1mCG4WJXxJbZl5tzH{border-top:1px solid var(--newRedditTheme-line);margin-top:16px;padding-top:16px}._11ARF4IQO4h3HeKPpPg0xb{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:none;fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;vertical-align:middle;margin-bottom:2px;margin-left:4px;cursor:pointer}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:hover ._11ARF4IQO4h3HeKPpPg0xb{display:inline-block}._2IvhQwkgv_7K0Q3R0695Cs{border-radius:4px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line)}._2IvhQwkgv_7K0Q3R0695Cs:focus{outline:none}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B{transition:all .1s linear 0s;border-radius:4px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line)}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:focus{outline:none}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B.IeceazVNz_gGZfKXub0ak,._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk{margin-top:25px;left:-9px}._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP,._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP:focus-within,._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP:hover{transition:all .1s linear 0s;border:none;padding:8px 8px 0}._25yWxLGH4C6j26OKFx8kD5{display:inline}._2YsVWIEj0doZMxreeY6iDG{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;padding:4px 6px}._1hFCAcL4_gkyWN0KM96zgg{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;margin-left:auto;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._1hFCAcL4_gkyWN0KM96zgg,._1dF0IdghIrnqkJiUxfswxd{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._1dF0IdghIrnqkJiUxfswxd{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3VGrhUu842I3acqBMCoSAq{font-weight:700;color:#ff4500;text-transform:uppercase;margin-right:4px}._3VGrhUu842I3acqBMCoSAq,.edyFgPHILhf5OLH2vk-tk{font-size:12px;line-height:16px}.edyFgPHILhf5OLH2vk-tk{font-weight:400;-ms-flex-preferred-size:100%;flex-basis:100%;margin-bottom:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX{margin-top:6px}._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._3MAHaXXXXi9Xrmc_oMPTdP{margin-top:4px} Its torturous. Tempting fate, I tried it on. For more groan-worthy humour, find out what would happen if the person who named walkie-talkies named everything. The 2 Most Psychologically Incisive Films of 2022, The Surprising Role of Empathy in Traumatic Bonding. Submitted by Dan Upham, I have always been a disappointment. Youll just end up looking comedic and thats not what were going for here. Where are average things manufactured? Youve been complaining ever since you got here., Two pirates, Morty and Sol, meet in a bar. Well-dressed, with a flower pinned to his lapel, he cut a suave figure. Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. Someone on the other side of the wall screamed, Hey, you jerk! One thing about Fred, his buddy says to the bartender. Good heavens, the first doctor said to the second, look at that poor crippled fellow., Yeah, answered the second doctor. So now I got me a hook., I was standin on a dock, and the biggest seagull I ever saw poops right in me eye., But ya dont go blind from no seagull poop., True, says Sol. Cant you just tell me?Submitted by Dana Thayer. He gives the head monk a long stare and says, I quit., Im not surprised, the head monk says. You have to touch them all over before they respond. 5. No, it doesnt. Yes, it does. Do you own a doghouse? We missed the R!, Father! cries the young monk. Crime in multi-storey car parks. This was because he wanted to make sure that their knee-caps were alright! 25 of Peter Kays most ingenious jokes and one-liners Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar. You didnt look to your right, yelled the frightened inspector. I told the Inland Revenue I dont owe them a penny. Two weeks after I had photos taken of my baby, I returned to the studio to view the pictures on a colour monitor. She glares at the other little boy and asks, What do you want for breakfast? Since Margaret was gone several minutes, she felt the need to explain her absence to me: My friend and I arent able to spend much time together anymore because she is more decapitated than I am. Submitted by Vicki Alum, At a job review, my boss told me this year the company would compensate for inflation but that additional raises would be considered on a case-by-case basis. Keep your voice steady, avoid sounding too pleased with yourself, and deliver the line with a straight face. Mom: How make chicken Daughter: What? If youre going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty. -Marilyn Monroe, 38. What gives you the right to stereotype blondes that way? she demands. Diddly-squats. Whenever we'd start talking and she didn't want to hear it she would sing, "Oh the monkey wrapped his tail around the flag pole, to wipe his butt hole, and see the world! ._9ZuQyDXhFth1qKJF4KNm8{padding:12px 12px 40px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM,._1JmnMJclrTwTPpAip5U_Hm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:40px;padding-top:4px;text-align:left;margin-right:28px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM ._24r4TaTKqNLBGA3VgswFrN{margin-left:6px}._306gA2lxjCHX44ssikUp3O{margin-bottom:32px}._1Omf6afKRpv3RKNCWjIyJ4{font-size:18px;font-weight:500;line-height:22px;border-bottom:2px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:8px}._2Ss7VGMX-UPKt9NhFRtgTz{margin-bottom:24px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP{border-bottom:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:2px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP:last-of-type{border-bottom-width:0}._2qAEe8HGjtHsuKsHqNCa9u{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);padding-bottom:8px;padding-top:8px}.c5RWd-O3CYE-XSLdTyjtI{padding:8px 0}._3whORKuQps-WQpSceAyHuF{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px}._1Qk-ka6_CJz1fU3OUfeznu{margin-bottom:8px}._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-weight:500}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb,._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-size:12px;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb{font-weight:400}.horIoLCod23xkzt7MmTpC{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:#ea0027}._33Iw1wpNZ-uhC05tWsB9xi{margin-top:24px}._2M7LQbQxH40ingJ9h9RslL{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px} How are you doing mentally and emotionally? He seems fine now, says the vet. Via Getty Images/Michael Heim / EyeEm. Youre drunk.. Two whales walk into a bar. Soccer was the first sport that many of us tried. Shave my head.Submitted by Abdulmajeed Mamudu, Two criminals are taking a walk deep in the woods one dark night. Ill tell you whatnever again. Here are the best insulting smartass quotes we could find. The cop replies: Then why do I smell wine?, The priest looks at the bottle and says: Good Lord! This Teen Pulled A Hilariously Cold "Knock Knock" Joke To Block A Guy Not only is it terrible, its terrible. Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection, except one. If you laugh at these dark jokes, youre probably a genius. Need the laughs to come fast? Obviously, use them only when the conversation gets out of control and the other person stoops to insults. Youre running around with another womanadmit it! she demanded. BEWARE OF DOG! Some days you eat cupcakes and refuse to put on pants. Well, if they liked having one of you, they must be even happier now. Actually, she replied, the manager was telling my sister that she was such a good worker that he wished he could clone her. All Im saying is, if you caught me, then you were speeding too., 44. However, if you can do the raised eyebrow look, it will add a dose of irony and really? to your quote. He bit himself. "c**tpuffin, "It's always hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they're always taking things literally. Love you too. Laughfactory.com, Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? They have seemingly never tried to keep a dozen people quiet while planning a surprise party. Jennifer Wright, author, I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner. From the best clean jokes for adults to funny clean jokes of the day, this big SFW list has something hilarious for everyone: kids, teens, seniors and co-workers. As they hurtle towards the ground, the parrot says to the terrified man, Wow, that took a lot of guts for a guy with no wings.Anonymous. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, Pull over!, No! the woman yelled back, Cardigan! Reddit.com, I quit my job working for Nike. Submitted byLucinda Rajaselvan, The police are called to an apartment and find a woman standing over a lifeless man, holding a bent and twisted five-iron. 2. In fact, people love sarcasm, which makes it a great outlet to get all of that pent-up resentment out while slapping a smile on your face. Submitted by D.T. Thesecheesy pick-up lines are are sure to get you a laugh (if not love). Ill call you back when youre alone. Jim Pietsch in The New York City Cab Drivers Joke Book, If I pay $40 for a haunted house I better die. @hodgesboi15, Have children while your parents are young enough to take care of them. Rita Rudner, A mom texts, Hi! He immediately smells alcohol on the priests breath and notices an empty wine bottle in the car. Fo drizzle! You cant make somebody love you. Submitted by Rita Hickey, A little boy was sitting beside me in the hospital waiting room. When she put the saucer on the floor, he was surprised. '", "Why did the old woman fall into the well? You keep out of this! she yells. These funny tweets about food are sure to make you smile. "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? God says, No. I cant, says the poodle. You know, this is my first operation. The blacksmith instructed the boy, When I take the shoe out of the fire, Ill lay it on the anvil; and when I nod my head, you hit it with this hammer.. A hobo knocks on the door of the St. George and the Dragon Inn. If you do not understand English, press 2. Recording on an Australian tax help line. The young monk gets worried and goes down to look for him. Honey, whats for supper?. The detective asks, Is that your husband? Yes, replies the woman. Reproduction without explicit permission is prohibited. But the left arm is a lot longer than the right arm, he complained. While the professor was impressed with my work, she said she had deducted a few marks for a spelling error. But doesnt that suit fit great?. Submitted by Adam J. Smargon, Did you hear about the identical twins who robbed a bank? ._2a172ppKObqWfRHr8eWBKV{-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;margin-right:8px}._39-woRduNuowN7G4JTW4I8{margin-top:12px}._136QdRzXkGKNtSQ-h1fUru{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:8px 0;width:100%}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_,._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{margin-left:auto}._1-25VxiIsZFVU88qFh-T8p{padding:0}._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor)} 20 of The Young Ones most gloriously silly quotes Submitted by Mark Flowerdew, Fresh out of gift ideas, a man buys his mother-in-law a large plot in an expensive cemetery. My father-in-law calmly shook his head. Derry Girls: 35 of the funniest quotes and one-liners You cross my mind only on Thursday morning. Later, they order an other round. Again, the bird gives the crew grief for being slow and the businessman joins in, Yeah, the service stinks! Just then, the flight attendant grabs the pair, opens the hatch and throws them out of the plane. Yes, I said. Theyll be ready next Friday.Submitted by Ronald Moore, A: Cookie sheets. At your age, I wouldnt touch alcohol! Detector: Beep. Mother laughs: Ha! Why did the chicken go to the sance? How did you do it? he asked. In other words, how many chicken does it take to change a light bulb? Says the chicken, Sorry, but thats the subject of another joke.Submitted by Gary Johnston. You have to touch them all over before they respond. They avoid contact with humans so we suggest you attach small bells to your rucksacks and give the bears time to get out of your way. We missed the R! 49 of Monty Pythons funniest jokes Hes in the village over the other direction.. ' Tim Vine, Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. Finally, he hollers, Hey! Lemme try some of that! The man grabs the beer. When Chuck Norris comes to your house he breaks your tooth and takes your money. Mom: Where buy chicken Daughter: Mom, this isnt Google. Still, Id like you to mail me the results., A few days later, he received a postcard from the doctors office. Light travels faster than sound. Dont drink that, I said. Whats it called? It says, Do not feed. Then she called, Here, kittySubmitted by Khalid Khan. Instantly, the car appears on the beach. Between you and me, something smells. Hes peeing in the refrigerator again!, For his birthday, an old mans nephews secretly hire a call girl for him. ", "If I agreed with you, then we'd both be wrong. He was just going through a stage. You Couldn't Handle Me Even If I Came With Instructions - Amazon.com The businessman asks for a Coke. ._3oeM4kc-2-4z-A0RTQLg0I{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between} "What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? The bartender says, Whatll you have? The skeleton says, Gimme a beer and a mop.. you couldn't kick jokes - Laque.com.my You know, says the crook, this is more than I wanted to spend. None, I replied. Women are like iPhones. How Psychologically Conditioned Rats Are Defusing Landmines, The Innate Intelligence Observed in the Dying Process. Is it true, she wanted to know, that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life? Yes, Im afraid so, said the doctor. Submitted by Fred Meckley, A man is recovering from a minor surgery when a nurse comes in to check on him. [Read: 60 creative insults to intellectually insult someone with sarcasm and leave everyone around laughing]. We recommend our users to update the browser. Who knows, we might be able to! You dont want to be that person who could literally write a book about what you wish you would have said. Looking back, he says, maybe I shouldnt have started with the circumcision.. Couldn't find his way through a maze even if the rats helped him. Are you looking for some funny kids football jokes? A young monk arrives at the monastery. Just keep your right knee bent a little at all times, walk like this, and no one will notice. Jenna and Bill are finishing up a dinner date. Then it hit me. Get Your Laugh on with these funny redneck sayings: He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. 100 of the best clean jokes and one-liners What do you call a fake noodle? Its easy, replies the ranger. A: Copies. 70. 3. I cant stand this. He looked at all the rings on my fingers, then exclaimed, You must have had a lot of husbands! Submitted by Esther Dawson, Me: I brought some books for us to read. Liked what you just read? 25 of Spike Milligans greatest gags All it was doing was gathering dust. @dadsaysjokes. I had only that single dollar, and I had to make a decision: Give it to his worthy cause or keep it. You know, youre a real jerk when youre drunk, Superman., Every 10 years, the monks in the monastery are allowed to break their vow of silence to speak two words. These smartass quotes about breakups are sure to help you out. You wont look cool if you show everyone just how happy you are with your efforts! 72. Lets explore the role of humor in an intimate relationship. This is one of the times in life when you should keep a straight face. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?, 18. That night I went to a church meeting and the speaker told us about his humanitarian work. Thanks for dating someone ugly after we broke up., 17. ._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa{margin-top:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._3EpRuHW1VpLFcj-lugsvP_{color:inherit}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa svg._31U86fGhtxsxdGmOUf3KOM{color:inherit;fill:inherit;padding-right:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._2mk9m3mkUAeEGtGQLNCVsJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;color:inherit} Months? Math teacher: If I have three bottles in one hand and two in the other hand, what do I have? She then reassured him by adding, Now, if you do everything Ive told you, you wont be with us for long.. Hows it work? Watch, said the drunk. I listened in and overheard Mitch say to Matt, Even if you were an only child, you still wouldnt be Mom and Dads favourite. Submitted by Denise Horn, While working the beverage cart at the local golf course, a customer asked me if I could go back to the previous green to see if she had left her sandwich there. Submitted by Paul Lewis, I think my goldfish has seizures, a man tells the veterinarian. If you have ever been offended by someone with nothing but a gaping mouth and a figurative puff of smoke as a response, you know how tragic a lack of a comeback can feel. Yes, I said, but I really dont need it., Without missing a beat, she replied, We dont sell things that people need. Joe Caputo. @keyframes _1tIZttmhLdrIGrB-6VvZcT{0%{opacity:0}to{opacity:1}}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd,.HQ2VJViRjokXpRbJzPvvc{--infoTextTooltip-overflow-left:0px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;padding:3px 9px;position:absolute;border-radius:4px;margin-top:-6px;background:#000;color:#fff;animation:_1tIZttmhLdrIGrB-6VvZcT .5s step-end;z-index:100;white-space:pre-wrap}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd:after,.HQ2VJViRjokXpRbJzPvvc:after{content:"";position:absolute;top:100%;left:calc(50% - 4px - var(--infoTextTooltip-overflow-left));width:0;height:0;border-top:3px solid #000;border-left:4px solid transparent;border-right:4px solid transparent}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd{margin-top:6px}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd:after{border-bottom:3px solid #000;border-top:none;bottom:100%;top:auto} @keyframes ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5{0%{transform:rotate(0deg)}to{transform:rotate(1turn)}}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq{--sizePx:0;font-size:4px;position:relative;text-indent:-9999em;border-radius:50%;border:4px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyTextAlpha20);border-left-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);transform:translateZ(0);animation:ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5 1.1s linear infinite}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq,._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{width:var(--sizePx);height:var(--sizePx)}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{border-radius:50%}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq._2qr28EeyPvBWAsPKl-KuWN{margin:0 auto} The shaken turtle replies, I dont know. As they are walking out of the restaurant, Jenna starts to rifle through her purse to find her keys. Its from Uncle Ben. Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella? Seeing that she is getting upset, Bill comments, Come on. 55 Funny Food Jokes And Puns That Kids Will Relish - Fatherly When tea was served, the Queen removed her cup from her saucer. As a result, while in uniform, Im often mistaken for a flight attendant, a ticket agent, or even a snack bar employee. Im going back to living my fabulous life before you interrupted it to remind me that there are still assholes in this world., 20. Jenna and Bill are finishing up a dinner date. He thinks for a second before saying, Food bad., Its the big day, a decade later. Find out the 10 things you should never say to a Canadian. you couldn't kick jokesmichelle fleury ancestry. Have you popped into that new coffee shop across the street yet? asks one. ._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ{border-top:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-lineColor);margin-top:16px;padding-top:16px}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN{margin:0;padding:0}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;margin:8px 0}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ.QgBK4ECuqpeR2umRjYcP2{opacity:.4}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ label{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ label svg{fill:currentColor;height:20px;margin-right:4px;width:20px;-ms-flex:0 0 auto;flex:0 0 auto}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_{-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_ svg{display:inline-block;height:12px;width:12px}._2b2iJtPCDQ6eKanYDf3Jho{-ms-flex:0 0 auto;flex:0 0 auto}._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_{padding:0 12px}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:12px;letter-spacing:unset;line-height:16px;text-transform:unset;--textColor:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor);--textColorHover:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColorShaded80);font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;color:var(--textColor);fill:var(--textColor);opacity:1}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F._2UlgIO1LIFVpT30ItAtPfb{--textColor:var(--newRedditTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor);--textColorHover:var(--newRedditTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColorShaded80)}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:active,._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:hover{color:var(--textColorHover);fill:var(--textColorHover)}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:disabled,._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F[data-disabled],._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F[disabled]{opacity:.5;cursor:not-allowed}._3a4fkgD25f5G-b0Y8wVIBe{margin-right:8px} Oops.Submitted by Robert Rea, Steve, a lonely bachelor, wants some company, so he buys a centipede and a small box for it to live in. We werent looking for the same thing, she explained. The fellow was being sold a very cheap suit. Theres a smartass quote for that. [Read: Funny conversation starters and 40 lines to instantly fit right in]. 28 Star Wars jokes that will make you laugh (and cringe) Impressive, says the banker. Thinking this was pretty funny, I drove past even slower three more times, laughing as the camera snapped away each time I drove by at a snails pace. Face your problems, dont Facebook them., 4. Yo mama so ugly when she went into a haunted house she came out with a job application. During the Civil War, my great uncle fought for the west! Rodney Dangerfield. He replied, Only if she starts hanging out at hardware stores and buys a lot of power tools.. Friend making bad life choices? The man heads downstairs to the bar, settles into a huge barstool and orders a beer. Hold it in. Theyre making headlines. If anything, it made him more sluggish. Can Humans Detect Text by AI Chatbot GPT? A couple of dog owners are arguing about whose pet is smarter. I remember the day I earned my first dollar, he said. Thats the day when I take out the garbage., 16. There are no fish under the ice! He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. I dont know why. All of these build a cushion of positivity, warmth, and trust between partners. Alyshah Mehdi, a 19-year-old from Karachi, Pakistan, has been friends with a guy named Shayyan for a while, but lately, they've had "beef going on" between them, she told BuzzFeed News.
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